| Q1: I vomited a lot and attended work with a Coke in my pocket. I remember when having critical situations, I managed but then I vomited afterwards (No. 82).
Q2: … being pregnant is perhaps not a disease, but that is when I felt the sickest (No. 88).
Q3: Before I became pregnant, I thought that I would be in great shape. I was relying on that. That is what I had experience with, you know. But the second time I was even worse, actually. I was just lying in bed for a long period with as little light and sound disturbance as possible. Not eating. So needless to say, you are not contributing much [at work] (No. 88).
Q4: I’ve had pregnant colleagues who obviously have been very dizzy with low blood pressure and shouldn’t be at work (No. 91). | Q5: During that period when I was really ill I spent more time at work than I really feel I should have. It was my reactivity, inability to concentrate and things like that that made me a little scared of myself. I found it a bit scary. It was very unpleasant (No. 88).
Q6: I think that if I really believe I would have represented a danger to the patient, then I would not have done it [gone to work pregnant, suffering from extreme nausea and vomiting]. However, I am not sure I myself would have wanted to be treated by such an ill person (No. 96).
Q7: And I remember an episode where I needed to perform an emergency caesarean. It was so critical with little time. I remember, the [hospital] bed was thrown right into my stomach (No. 82).
Q8: I’ve been working 24-hour shifts, having eaten nothing, had three patients at 3, 4 and 5 am, and vomited between every patient. Because I’ve been pregnant. I’ve done that several times (No. 96).
Q9: It was pretty exhausting to be working full time. So, in retrospect, I might well have worked a little less. Because I was so tired when I came home from work and spent the rest of the day recovering (No. 82).
Q10: I’ve been thinking that about pregnancy; if one pushes oneself, and then something happens. Then I think it would have been so painful to go around thinking for the rest of my life that … ‘Was it because I worked far too much that I had a miscarriage, or was it …’ Right? You can have a miscarriage anyway, but what if you didn’t push yourself too hard and triggered it (No. 93).
Q11: During my first pregnancy, and actually also the second: even though I vomited on every shift, I completed all my shifts until week 28. When I have exemption from shift. And I regret that a bit now, because I don’t know whether that could be the reason I have a [chronically] sick child (No. 97). | Q12: I couldn’t have applied for work then, before I had completed my internship and passed, so then I probably would have gone for a longer period without a salary, and obviously, that’s got financial implications too (No. 88).
Q13: I was to try to complete my education. I had to become a specialist (bangs the table). I had to do that. Not wait too long. After all, I was going to stay at home for an entire year during maternity leave, so I should try to accomplish as much as possible before that (No. 82).
Q14: have experienced myself when getting employed being questioned about my civil status and if I plan getting pregnant and such things. It felt uncomfortable. I have also had colleagues who haven’t had their temporary contracts prolonged, because they have been pregnant. So it is definitely a problem. Some departments where they almost exclusively hire young men as residents. Because it’s so difficult with ‘these women, who become pregnant all the time’ (No. 91).
Q15: Pregnant employees, who get to hear from their senior female colleagues: ‘What? Are you on sick leave when pregnant? I myself worked until the contractions started. Worked my shifts till the waters broke’. Such stories being talked about in a very positive way. Like everything was better before. That sets a sort of standard in the work environment (No. 86).
Q16: The women were the worst. Women at 50-60years. Sure, that’s where that comment comes from. They have gone with a walker to work, suffered from pelvis instability, and still attending. They only compare to oneself (No. 88).
Q17: Our boss has a term, Little Parsley that is being used about those who are perceived a little weak, who is away from work a lot, complains a lot, or a pregnant woman who has pain here and pain there. It’s a well-known term. And you do not want to be Little Parsley (No. 97). | Q18: If I were pregnant now? Then I simply would have called in sick. I would have said, find a substitute and hire him or her temporarily. There is something about the first time [of pregnancy], isn’t it? You are very vulnerable when you are doing your internship (No. 88).
Q19: I think that if somebody had taken a different approach, talked to me, explained and sketched out the possibilities of finalising my internship. Such as ‘If you’re short of five shifts, then there’s no problem finalising those when you are back from your maternity leave’ (No. 88). |
| Q20: At times it has been nice to be home with sick children. Because when I have been tired and half sick myself I have rested on the couch where the children slept. Then it’s been nice to be home. But I have reported is as absence due to ‘sick child’ (No. 82).
Q21: I do believe that some of those times I’ve reported absence due to a sick child, I have been home myself, [ill] also, sort of (No. 88). | Q22: I have heard it from the kindergarten, yeah. That I sent the kids there when they were sicker, more than other parents. They have called me sometimes, with a sort of annoyed tone and said that you must come and pick them up (No. 88).
Q23: I’ve often been annoyed; they call from the kindergarten, saying, ‘Oh, your daughter is so tired’. You would think they could let her rest on the couch for a few hours until I come and get her […] I guess the kids have gotten quite used to taking care of themselves. Basically. They’ve looked after each other a lot, and helped each other. They had to get used to, from an early stage, that they had to be home alone, at least for half of the day if they were otherwise ill, they were from quite early on, alone (No. 89).
Q24: One reflects quite a lot upon what makes children the way they are. The upside of that is that they perhaps become a bit tougher. The downside is perhaps that some children feel an enormously high expectation pressure if they do not manage being sick on their own […] What I find very interesting about that is this; reflecting upon what it is that makes you sort of a worthy human being. Because I think, some transitions are not always that clear, concerning which signals we give to ourselves as well as to our children (No. 89).
Q25: Then (sent a sick child to the kindergarten) I thought that this time I might be crossing the line. When I push my children to go to the kindergarten with a fever. One thing is to be hard on oneself, but I am not proud of trying to make the children hard. I don’t think that’s right. At that time, I felt I was crossing a line (No. 100). | Q26: If the absence [because of a sick child] is related to a shift, then it is very unpopular. It is a bit: ‘Could you not attend if …’ (No. 78).
Q27: It is always hectic and then you know that they are short on staff. So you know that if I don’t come today, the other person for sure has to work overtime. And you know them, and that one of them might want to attend that parental meeting. And you know that if I am absent, your colleague must work overtime and then she’ll have to stay until 7 pm. So there I think you have the main reason for having a high threshold for staying home from work (No. 88).
Q28: Like when I was at department XX, I didn’t hear once during two months that any of the physicians was absent due to a sick child. And there were a lot of male doctors there. Male doctors…who I think had wives who did most of the caring for the children (No. 86).
Q29: These senior consultants who were sort of 5,6,7,8 years ahead of me, they, like, could sit there till 8 pm every evening. But I’m thinking this; then I can’t be here. Then my family life goes. And it doesn’t work. That’s the advantage of younger colleagues, because they don’t accept that either. They also want to go home on time, and luckily, the men want that largely (No. 93).
Q30: When you don’t have a permanent position, it’s very easy to think that you want to avoid every little thing that can seem negative. That goes for overtime, if you are sick a lot, if you stay away from other things, if you need to ask for help a lot. One wants to be independent, solve the problem, right, show that you are good at this (No. 86).
Q31: I don’t dare stay home from work. It’s because I don’t feel safe that I’d be attended to by my employer. And I have heard them talk so much shit about other girls being sick, so I assume, that if I’m sick, they will talk the same way about me. I haven’t stayed home with him one day since he started school. He has been ill. But mostly he stays at home alone when he’s ill. And when the children are ill, and in afternoons and evening, I’d prefer to stay home with them. It hurts me to not be able to stay home. Now I’ve hardly been home with sick children at all during my career. But it hurts me to leave them. I’d rather have stayed home (No. 36).
Q32: So if my boss had asked: Would you prefer her with two sick kids or do you want him, who has worked for 10 years and been in good health. Fully motivated and that. I would perhaps have chosen the colleague whom I know is motivated and whom I know could take some work off my shoulders (No. 99).
| Q37: And that is of immense importance for your family situation. To be able to leave. Not to have to stay when there is overdue work, when something happens, when you stand there with a patient, right. You can’t just drop it because, ‘Oh, kindergarten is closing’. You have to stay there till somebody else takes over. That is a major difference, and that’s the reason why I’ve chosen the way I have. To get more time at home. To have that opportunity (No. 88).
Q38: Being ill is one thing. Something else is having small children and being tired and sleeping too little. Considering that I think that perhaps most employees who have small children should be offered the opportunity to work a little less. I think that would be reasonable (No. 82).
Q39: Some stepped down because they had three small children. A result of that was that they did not get their positions extended, and talk amongst colleagues. One became unpopular, simply. Yes. Bullied. In the canteen when you are talking about someone who’s not there (No. 82). |
| | Q33: Yes, throughout the years we have heard stories from colleagues who brought their kids with them on their night shifts and put them to sleep there, when they were called in at night. Or who abandoned sick children and had to ask the neighbour to look after them and such things. Oh, it’s a bit heroic, to have such stories to tell then (No. 97).
Q34: It’s kind of uncomfortable to experience oneself, but I see now that I sometimes appear a bit like my superiors when I was 20 years younger, that they become a bit, like, bitchy. A bit like ‘Ah, you should have tried, seen what it was like when we were young. We worked much more, and it was much harder, and now you ought to stop complaining’. When we appeared on shift, and placed our children at emergency because they were sick. Because we believe we have worked so hard ourselves, that we deserve to like … Kind of that contempt for weakness. ‘You are now 30 years old and at your best age, you really should be able to handle a fair bit’. There’s quite a bit of that (No. 89).
Q35: There was an episode quite recently where there was a woman who had a boy who was to start kindergarten, and that was not ok (for the manager) at all, who talked about it being in the middle of the holidays in addition to them being short on staff. Then the rest of us managed to adapt, ‘sure, we’ll ask someone from the other department to, we’ll improvise and sort it out’ (No. 82).
Q36: At (department X) and (department Y) you could say there are two extremes. It’s a complete different environment. At department X perhaps the work pressure is higher, more grave decisions, but they still manage to maintain a much more collegial atmosphere (No. 86). | |