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Engaging with trauma
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| Problem solving | Adults = 11 Parents = 7 | Taking concrete steps or direct action to address or alleviate sources of stress | Deductive | “In my marriage I started out running to my parents every time me and my wife fought over something, but now I try to solve it myself…That's the hardest thing for people on the spectrum is being their own problem solver.” (Jasper, 27-year-old man) |
| | | | “…Two years ago … he came upstairs and said ‘I just went on Facebook and here's this post from my sister saying she's homeless and begging for places to live- I can't take this anymore, I'm blocking them on Facebook cause I have a degree I need to get and I can't look at this' and that was the first time I've ever really seen him proactively saying ‘there's more coming and I just won't be part of it'.” (Marissa and Tom, stepparents of 22-year-old man, Josh) |
| Social support | Adults = 14 Parents= 15 | Utilizing others for assistance or support | Deductive | “I have one really close friend … we're like sisters but she lives in England and I'm thankful for email because that was where a lot of it [stress over threat of homelessness] went, I knew that she understood.” (Jenny, 64-year-old woman) |
| | | | “…he was calling me like every hour… he just had a really hard time not understanding why he was being left out… And he will call me and tell me how lonely he is.” (Karen, mother of 20-year-old man, Justin) |
| Expressing emotions | Adults = 4 Parents = 8 | Explicitly communicating one's emotional state | Deductive | “…This last school year she's been having more anger and we've talked about the fact that she's autistic and she can't speak so she's been displaying a lot of frustration with the fact that she's autistic because she can type, so she says ‘I hate being autistic', ‘I hate being me', ‘I want to be able to talk', ‘I wish I could be like my sister'.” (Samara, mother of 9-year-old girl, Zahara, who is non-verbal but communicates through typing) |
| | | | “I'll go off into another room just to think about what actually I want to say and how I want to express my anger… I've got to take a step back, take a deep breath, leave the room, and [tell my wife], ‘I am angry with you because you said this'.” (Jasper, 27-year-old man) |
| Self-criticism | Adults = 5 Parents = 7 | Blaming or criticizing oneself for the trauma | Deductive | “I still have this fear that I'm going to do something wrong at my job, that one little thing. Cause there were parts at my current job in which… I forgot to do one thing and it sort of screwed everything up and that got me all anxious and angry at myself.” (Randy, 27-year-old man) |
| | | | “…He would sometimes ask me to send him away. ‘I'm terrible, I'm horrible, I hit you, I did this to you, I did that to you, you should just send me away, send me to an orphanage.' …He catastrophizes everything, like everything is the worst day ever, ‘I'm the worst kid ever'.” (Dorothy, mother of 12-year-old boy, Riley) |
| Cognitive restructuring | Adults = 10 Parents = 2 | Actively attempting to change thought patterns that may be negative/ harmful, looking at things from different perspective | Deductive | “…[I] try to think positive thoughts about myself, my friends, and even some positive thoughts about the people in my environment that have been bothering me. If I think some positive thoughts about them then that may actually help me and it has.” (Alex, 37-year-old man) |
| Rumination | Adults = 9 Parents = 7 | Repeatedly experiencing negative thought patterns in relation to the trauma/stressor | Inductive | “I didn't recover from stressful or upsetting events the way normal children did. I didn't have a normal ability to regulate my emotions, and I couldn't calm myself down the way other children my age could, but because of my age the adults around me decided I should be able to and refused to help me… If I do something wrong or if someone does something bad to me, it never, ever goes away. It just replays in my mind at intervals for the rest of my life. Not constantly, but it just keeps coming back…” (Martha, 37-year-old woman) |
| | | | “And she still dwells on it as she dwells on a lot of the other traumatic experiences… It means a lot of talking to herself at night, she goes through long lectures to herself, long discussions with other people and so on when they're not there.” (Ken, father of 29-year-old woman, Amal) |
| Self-growth/resilience | Adults = 11 Parents = 8 | Transforming past trauma into positive learning experiences or | Inductive | “I give people like me more latitude with behavior because I know it's difficult.” (Darrell, 52-year-old man) |
| | opportunities for personal growth/self-awareness | | “He is a resilient kid, he has really done the work of establishing that relationship [with his father] and he's done the work of being forgiving … so this poor kid got kicked to the curb but he's very forgiving…” (Tina, mother of 16-year-old boy, John) |
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Disengaging with trauma
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| Problem avoidance | Adults = 6 Parents = 6 | Actively avoiding the problem or the stressor | Deductive | “…He would you know start warming up to the school again, and then [being secluded or physically restrained] would happen… then the whole year would be ruined because then he would refuse to go to school… and it would just…go right downhill” (Akira, mother of 22-year-old man, Malik) |
| | | | “I run away… try to avoid her [mother who has been emotionally abusive] as much as possible. Ignore her constant phone messages and texts and stuff.” (Antonio, 24-year-old man) |
| Social withdrawal | Adults = 9 Parents = 8 | Withdrawing from social relationships and/or avoiding social | Deductive | “I decided it's easier to be a loner than it is to try to fit in where I don't belong.” (Peter, 39-year-old man) |
| | situations | | “I said it is trauma because I think he shied away from people after [being bullied] and he really doesn't have any friends and doesn't really connect with people. And I know part of the that is the Asperger's, but there are people with Asperger's that do have friends.” (Rihanna, mother of 26-year-old man, Paz) |
| Wishful thinking | Adults = 5 Parents = 2 | Engaging in fantasy to avoid dealing with the stressor in hopes that | Deductive | “As a kid I would fantasize about running away.” (Martha, 37-year-old woman) |
| | the problem will go away | | “He doesn't want to grow up basically… when they talk about jobs and pay and growing up and being independent, I don't think that he likes that. He wants to remain a child and one of the reasons I think is that when he was a child he had a family, I think that losing the family was the biggest traumatic event for him and he still wants to remain a child I think.” (Anita, mother of 26-year-old man, Sam) |
| Emotional Avoidance | Adults = 7 Parents = 2 | Concealing or suppressing emotions in order to keep functioning | Inductive | “It's almost like I was catatonic [after the death of my friend]. I stopped feeling anything all together.” (Peter, 39-year-old man) |
| | | | “I think he can really compartmentalize. He can really stuff things down and keep going as though it didn't happen because he's had no choice…but he's paid for that in being told ‘you have no feelings', ‘you're robotic', but otherwise, I don't think he would have survived, I'm not sure.” (Marissa and Tom, stepparents of 22-year-old man, Josh) |
| Learned helplessness | Adults = 11 Parents = 5 | Adopting the perspective that the situation will never change and/or feeling | Inductive | “I had no one to go to… no one's coming to save me, no one's bailing me out, there's no superman to the rescue.” (Malik, 22-year-old man) |
| | hopeless | | “…When he's feeling sad he uses it as a ‘oh well I have autism there's no hope for me… I don't need to worry about school because I'm never going to be able to be anything'…” (Dorothy, mother of 12-year-old boy, Riley) |
| Self-protective behavior | Adults = 10 Parents = 6 | Being cautious in certain situations due to past trauma | Inductive | “I learned pretty early on it's not always a good thing if you attract the attention of adults so I kind of learned how to fly below the radar” (Jenny, 64-year-old woman) |
| | | | “He is very vigilant [after being physically assaulted by school staff and peers]… No matter who it is. His trust level is like zero.” (Akira, mother of 22-year-old man, Malik) |
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Self-regulatory coping
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| Substances | Adults = 7 Parents = 7 | Utilizing substances to cope with trauma | Inductive | “I abused substances a lot. Like when I was going out with [partner], I drank a lot and wanted to get high on everything I could put my hands on. Just basically to escape how dysfunctional the relationship was.” (Arya, 38-year-old woman) |
| | | | “I think, this is my personal opinion and I don't know if this is why he started smoking, it was so he could stand with smokers… It was a social thing, he was trying to fit in. And then he got hooked to the cigarettes.” (Rihanna, mother of 26 year old man, Paz) |
| Engaging in interests | Adults = 11 Parents = 12 | Participating in hobbies or activities to cope | Inductive | “…We'd have probably a half a library's worth of books, not even joking, we were avid readers … he's had the same night routine since, well honestly before he was born. I think [reading] helped with the moving.” (Georgie, mother of 6-year-old boy, Timmy) |
| | | | “There was no place I could go that was quiet, there was no place you know eventually I had a room of my own in the house and I started accumulating stuff… I think I was born to be a collector” (Lina, 53-year-old woman) |
| Self-injurious thoughts/behaviors | Adults = 11 Parents = 9 | Redirecting feelings to imagine escape from stressor or trauma | Inductive | “He is deathly afraid of fire drills and loud sounds startle him… And he told me he was, he actually made a suicide threat. He said I'll kill myself, I didn't realize in the moment it was about a fire drill, but he picked up a drill like a cordless drill and held it to his head, and said I'll kill myself I'm not going to school. I told him to put the drill down, and he did, and I kept him home that next day.” (Dorothy, mother of 12-year-old boy, Riley) |
| | | | “My father had just bought another house and my mother said well I'm not moving there, and that was it. And that was how it happened. And I recognize that, you know, that's where the emergence of the skin picking and scratching happened and um, you know, it was to a point where I had sores all over my skin… That wasn't something I knew then and as I kid had no idea that had something to do with my parents getting divorced. There was no way I was able to connect those as issues. But now have a lot of understanding of those things being related.” (Charlie, 22-year-old man) |
| Self-stimulatory/self-soothing behavior | Adults = 7 Parents = 11 | Behaviors the participant engages in to calm themselves or self-regulate, usually in overwhelming situations | Inductive | “There's certain things that make her feel better in general when she's anxious and tense [and possibly after her grandfather died] and they're kind of stimmy behaviors. Like her necklaces… the beads that they put in the bottom of the vase, the glass, her bins are full of those- she loves to run her hands through those.” (Samara, mother of 9-year-old girl, Zahara, who is non-verbal but communicates through typing) |
| | | | “…During the time that I'm [brushing my skin with a neck brush], it has a sound that it makes and when I have brushed on part of the skin and I start brushing somewhere else, there's still like a shadow of the sensations of where it had been and… listening to it and feeling that sort of tracking- that is something that blocks out any of the mental processes that are happening- it's grounding.” (Charlie, 22-year-old man) |
| Emotional outbursts without aggressive behavior | Adults = 3 Parents = 11 | Situations where the participant experiences overwhelming emotions, resulting in an outburst | Inductive | “I couldn't deal with all this anger and all this hate and all this frustration inside [from bullying, physical abuse by peers, and repeatedly transferring to new schools], I couldn't handle it, I couldn't keep it in, and… it came out in yes, screaming… it came out in meltdowns…” (Malik, 22-year-old man) |
| Emotional outbursts with aggressive behavior | Adults = 7 Parents = 8 | Emotional outbursts that are accompanied by aggressive behavior toward another person or object | | “All of the behaviors are associated with that anxiety and his lowering of his self-esteem but… when he was upset he would just punch the wall or like many times he has punched me and his dad and…” (Layla, mother of 19-year-old man, Sameer, who is minimally verbal) |
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Diagnostic overshadowing
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| Adults = 8 Parents = 14 | Instances in which coping behaviors overlap with, or are confused for, autism-related behaviors | Integrative | “I don't want to give anyone any information that might be used against me, and I think that people just are quick to look at [me] like, ‘something's wrong with him but I'm not sure what, something about him rubs me the wrong way', but they don't think maybe of the history…” (Malik, 22-year-old man) |
| | | | “A lot of behaviors [e.g., meltdowns] that…if you saw a neurotypical child showing, most people… would say something is not right there, whereas with autistic children, sometimes it might mean that something is very wrong and it sometimes it may just be their normal autistic behavior” (Georgia, mother of six-year-old boy, Timmy) |