Managing the Impact of Illness: The Experiences of Men with Prostate Cancer and their Spouses.

This qualitative study explored issues of support and coping for couples where the man had been diagnosed with prostate cancer. Thirty-four men with prostate cancer and their spouses were interviewed separately at three points in time: prior to surgery; 8 to 10 weeks post-surgery; and 11 to 13 months post-surgery. The core category for the couples' experience with diagnosis and treatment for prostate cancer was Managing the Impact of Illness. Five major domains emerged, including: dealing with the practicalities; stopping illness from interfering with everyday life; keeping relationships working; managing feelings; and making sense of it all. While it was clearly important for couples to manage illness and to reduce its potential intrusion into everyday life, this strategy had psychological costs as well as benefits. Men struggled to stay in control of their emotions and their lives, typically vacillating between the pulls of fierce self-reliance and fearful neediness. Women were constrained from employing their usual strategies of coping and were distressed by the complicated requirements of being supportive while also honoring their partners' need for self-reliance.