'In an important way, I did die': uncertainty and revival in persons living with HIV or AIDS.

This study reports the revival experiences of persons who once were reconciled to their death from HIV/AIDS but who, as a result of dramatic treatment responses, now believe they may survive (popularly known as the Lazarus Syndrome). A purposive sample of men and women living with HIV infection or AIDS were interviewed in six focus groups. As part of a larger study of uncertainty in HIV illness, participants described their uncertainty accompanying renewed health and a return to the joys and problems of continued life. While new discoveries about the disease and exciting antiretroviral therapies hold the promise of improved survival, ambiguity about the durability of treatment response and ultimate survival contribute to the level of uncertainty with which a patient must cope. The experience of uncertainty in the narratives about revival involved renegotiation. Participants described physical renewal as an unexpected new stressor forcing them to renegotiate: (a) feelings of hope and future orientation, (b) social roles and identities, (c) interpersonal relations, and (d) the quality of their lives. Implications for prevention, practice, research and theory are presented and suggestions for education and assistance are offered.